The truth

I am in a lethal and dangerously eloquent state at the moment. The pen is bleeding poison, but righteous poison nonetheless. I am tired of people thinking that they can treat me inadequately. Isn’t it just as well I got the silver, my pets, because the bullets will sting and hit home a few stark truths.

I do sometimes revel in maliciousness; i1t’s a Scorpio trait. We can rip people apart with our words.

On a specific level, I immensely dislike not hearing from someone in God knows how long, only to receive an email asking me for a  favour. This person is either completely stupid or entirely insensitive. A relationship that had been dying for a long time finally  breathed its last at the start of last month and I have not deigned to bore any of my associates with the details (although the ending was brought about by my own hand). Because I’m “fun” Laura. I’m expected to be entertaining, to look glamorous, to willingly listen to everyone’s stories (the ones that stretch on for two hours about people I have never met REALLY interest me, honestly). I’m not naturally one of these feminine, confiding souls but it would be nice to have someone who takes enough interest to actually enquire after me every so often, rather than someone who appears and vanishes on a whim and talks of nothing but themselves when they do appear. 

The other specific matter will remain confidential, for now.

I don’t know if I’m too smart, too harsh or too much of a lone wolf to keep these acquaintances. Are most people simply a disappointment or do I expect too much of them?

Having re-read “The Beautiful and Damned”, I can relate entirely to Gloria. Her disgust at motherhood, weak men and eternal restlessness apply to me perfectly.

So, that’s it. I was considering being a good sport but now I realise I have nothing to lose by behaving as casually as others behave towards me. In the past, I think I have chosen and stood by the wrong people; they have elected to waste my time rather than had the balls to tell me to fuck off if they didn’t want to spend any time with me. I’m a strong person; I want a straight answer rather than people who think they can keep me hanging on in a state of confusion as to what they want from me. These opponents obviously do not want to deal with the truth.

I realise that this is deeply personal, hence why I’ve avoided being TOO specific. I simply had to get it off my chest and am really sorry to the unsuspecting people who are likely to read this. I suspect the ones who have pissed me off won’t even cast an eye.

And if they do, at least they'll get the truth.